How many of us live life, looking into the mirrors of other people’s eyes, perceptions and opinions, trying to find the definition of our own selves within those constructs? I do this sometimes.

It’s challenging, defining yourself on your own terms. I think a lot of us live, wanting other people’s acceptance and approval. We want their applause, their smiles, and their compliments.

Mirror Mirror on the wall

Some people are like shattered mirrors. You’ll see no reflection of yourself in their eyes. This can be frustrating, especially if you have expectations of them, however unfounded they may be.

Some people reflect something good back to you and you feel happy and content. This emotion is ephemeral though. And it speaks mostly to one’s own ego.

How might we live a life based on our own definition of self when it’s ever changing? I’ve learned that basing a sense of self on accomplishments is a feeble foundation on which to create the self. Once you accomplish one thing, it’s on to the next thing. It’s like you always have something to prove to yourself.

What if we were all human beings, not human doings?

That’s a challenging task. How do we love ourselves without input from the external world?

That’s one of my goals – being fully actualized without the need for the world’s approval or input.

I’ll let you know when I reach this goal!

I recently returned from a quick business trip to south Florida. I love it when I get to do work in paradise!

I also love to travel alone, namely because it challenges me to get out of my comfort zone big time. I don’t mind rising at 4:30 a.m. to make an 8 a.m. flight. Plus, I kind of like talking to strangers in the airport. We always seem to find common ground when it comes to complaining about the customer service.

Two years ago in June, I traveled to New York City alone. It wasn’t the first time I had been there, but it was the first time I went on my own just for fun.

The idea came to me as I placed one of my fictional characters in the milieu of the Big Apple. It was a spark of inspiration! And, it scared me to no end, thinking of myself in the city alone. I could get mugged. I could lose my wallet. My luggage could go missing. Someone could follow me down a dark alley…. So much could go wrong.

And yet, so much of it turned out absolutely right!

A Room with a View

My trip to New York City was one of the best trips I’ve ever taken, anywhere, and I’ve taken some pretty great trips — albeit always with a companion.

It was my objective to hit the major art museums while there – the Museum of Modern Art, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Guggenheim, and a side trip to the Frick Museum, housed in the beautiful Gilded Era mansion on Fifth Avenue.

I also wanted to visit the Neue Galerie at 86th Street and Fifth Avenue, a museum that features many of Austrian artist Gustav Klimt’s work – including his famous portrait of Adele Bloch-Bauer (the subject of the recent film Woman in Gold) — but the museum was closed on the day I was up in those parts on the East Side. Damn! And no sachertorte at Café Sabarsky, for which I had been salivating. (Hint: The museum is closed on Tuesdays.)

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